Untitled

April 21st, 2014

I really don’t know how to respond to my parents telling me that they’ve ‘found a new home for Jazz’ 2 minutes before I got in my car for a 4 hour drive home. It doesn’t make sense to me. Dogs are my life and they selfishly made that decision without me. If hey were just honest and sat me down to come up with a solution for Jazz’s need to explore and run off everywhere, maybe I’d be more rational about this situation. But no, I got trapped. I brought my dog 4 hours to a new location without even knowing it. Best part is, my sister was in on it. In fact, she found the new home.
Fuck that new home. Fuck the guy who took her. And fuck my family who would so carelessly do something like this to me. They have no idea what this is going to do to me. Because they’re oblivious. Careless. Selfish. Their ‘love’ and ‘care’ just turned into the most disrespectful thing they could have ever done to me.
I hope my dad sees this in some way, even though, the odds are slim. The Facebook status I posted (“I feel like I just got hit by a bus… And my parents were the drivers. Happy f***ing Easter”) made them feel like shit. In fact, I know it did, to my dad anyway. I found out about 5 hours later when I got home from work, still trying to emotionally process the betrayal by my family. He made it pretty clear that I could leave ‘his’ house and that I could “pack my shit up and get the fuck out” for all he cared. Cool dad. Love you too.
All of the negative thoughts I’ve ever had don’t even compare to what I feel right now.
Word to the wise, don’t ever tell someone bad news before they get into a vehicle. Ever.
Because all I wanted to do was drive my car off a bridge and drown in the salty sea.


“You know that death is the most beautiful part of life, right? Death is beautiful because we all fear death. And fear is the most amazing emotion of all because it creates complete awareness. It brings you to now, and it makes you truly present. And when you’re truly present, that’s nirvana. That’s pure love. So death is pure love.”


Perspective

You know that death is the most beautiful part of life, right? Death is beautiful because we all fear death. And fear is the most amazing emotion of all because it creates complete awareness. It brings you to now, and it makes you truly present. And when you’re truly present, that’s nirvana. That’s pure love. So death is pure love.”

Perspective

(Source: executiveshade, via shelbinfriedrich)

themusicbuffet:

Ten Tigers - Bonobo

Bonobo💗

1. When your friends ask you to hangout, and you don’t feel like it, don’t go. Don’t ever do things halfway or do something that makes you uncomfortable. With everything, give all of yourself, even the pieces you never knew existed.

2. It is okay to not know. Everyone always despises the phrase, “I don’t know” but no one tells you that it is okay to not know. The becoming is more important than the being, anyways.

3. If someone ever makes you feel less, in any way, you have every right to walk away. You have every right to cut out toxic people in your life. To close the door on people who make you feel bad about who you are or what you stand for. Friends don’t tear down, they build up.

4. Loss is always going to happen. Just like paint will always chip and rain will always fall, loss will always be part of life. No matter how much I don’t like it, or avoid it, it is going to walk my way at several times in my life. Learn to embrace it and learn to get closure.

5. Give yourself a chance. Stop saying, “I don’t think I can” or “But what if I am not able to?” and give yourself a chance. This may be cliche, but try to believe in yourself. When you get older, your knees won’t work the same and you won’t have the best memory, and you are going to wish you’d given yourself a chance years sooner.

6. Fall in love. Don’t be guarded before you fall in love. You could fall in love three times and still not find the right one, but none of it is going to make “the one” matter less. Don’t fall into that idea that your first love has to be your best love. Fall in love as many times as it naturally happens.

7. Firsts are going to be messy. First loves, first kisses, first dates, first failed tests, first college class, first time you drive a car, first time you ride a plane - first times were made to be imperfect. Just because it’s messy and all over the place, doesn’t mean it can’t be good or worthwhile.

8. You want another scoop of ice-cream? Go get it. Get three more scoops of ice-cream if that is what you want. “Fat” is not the opposite of beautiful and it is not the opposite of happy. Don’t let anyone tell you that your body type isn’t beautiful. Beauty is a social construct, create your own, become your own.

9. Let yourself be alone. Loneliness is not a bad thing. It is healthy and normal. Everyone needs to spend a good portion of their life alone. We learn who we are when we are alone; life is less crowded and more clear when we are alone.

10. If you aren’t happy where you are, change it. Quit your job, move, become a vegetarian, get a new hobby, pick up an old hobby, whatever you do - make sure it benefits you. Life is too short to not be alive, to not be passionate, and overflowing.

Amanda Helm  (via exoticwild)

I rarely reblog on this page but this is one of my favorite things Iv’e seen on tumblr and every time I read it it speaks to me more and more. 

(via noimjustablog)

(via bun-y)

(Source: souultree, via bun-y)

I am constantly torn between wanting to improve myself and wanting to destroy myself. (via bun-y)

So true

(Source: raccoonruckus, via bun-y)

(Source: geldimyoktunuz, via bun-y)

Love this.

Love this.

(Source: bluelightvine)